The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 39

The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 39:

At Jingzhou, The Son Of Liu Biao Thrice Begs Advice;

At Bowang Slope, The Directing Instructor Plans His First Battle.

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WARNING! TYPING IN ALL CAPS IS REALLY ANNOYING. I should stop it. Maybe............NAH!!!!

Chapter 39 opens, as most chapters tend to, where the last one left off. The navy of the Southland, led by Gan Ning, has taken the battle to Huang Zu, who naturally is no fitting match for Gan Ning. So it is that Huang Zu, who slew Mi Heng in a drunken rage, himself meets his demise, at the hands of a disgruntled ex-subordinate. I don't know, maybe Gan Ning was the first postal employee...

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The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 38

The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 38:

Zhuge Liang Plans For The Three Kingdoms;

Sun Quan Attacks Xiakou To Take Revenge.

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WARNING! THE SANGUO YANYI AUDIOBOOK IS BACK IN PRODUCTION, BITCHES! (Oh yeah, and something about spoilers, too.)

So it's been pretty much a whole month since I last posted one of these (or, for that matter, anything). I know, right? I'm a lazy one, I am. Wanna see if I've still got it? Download and/or listen to the episode live, and read the commentary to figure that one out, I guess.

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The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 37

The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 37:

Sima Hui Recommends A Scholar To Liu Bei;

Liu Bei Pays Three Visits To The Sleeping Dragon Ridge.

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WARNING! HOLY CRAP! THERE'S A VERITABLE BUTTLOAD OF POETRY IN THIS CHAPTER!

Yes, indeed, Chapter 37 is an important chapter in the story, in terms of plot development. I get that. Yes, Liu Bei's running out of options, and needs someone truly qualified to advise him in domestics and especially in war. I get that. But did they absolutely have to cram a shit-ton of poetry into this chapter? I mean, have mercy on the poor bastard that has to produce the audiobook. Of course, audiobooks, and indeed, recorded audio itself, was unknown to the people of the Han, and to their descendants who no doubt wrote this story, so I guess I can't really bitch too much. After all, I DID get through it.........eventually.

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The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 36

The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 36:

Shan Fu's Strategy: Fankou Is Captured;

Xu Shu's Affection: Zhuge Liang Is Recommended.

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WARNING! ZHUGE LIANG IS A BAAAAAD MUTHA.... (SHUT YO MOUTH!) but I'm just talking about Zhuge Liang...(we can dig it!)

Yes, and so is Xu Shu. At the end of the last chapter, Xu Shu was handing Liu Bei a victory against Lu Xiang and Lu Kuang, the recently surrendered former generals of Yuan Shao who had been sent south with Cao Ren and Li Dian. Because Xu Shu is also a badass.

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The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 35

The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 35:

Liu Bei Meets A Recluse At Nanzhang;

Shan Fu Sees A Noble Lord At Xinye.

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WARNING: THE FOLLOWING COMMENTARY MAY, AND PROBABLY WILL, INVOLVE SOME SPOILERS.

At the end of the last chapter, Cai Mao, that disgusting excuse for a human being, laid a trap to kill Liu Bei. Liu Bei, due to an almost miraculous leap over the River Tan, managed to escape the fate Cai Mao had planned for him, and now finds himself face to face with Zhao Yun, he called Zilong, who, if he knew what Cai Mao had tried to do, would quite literally rip the man apart piece by piece.

And how, oh, HOW the course of history would have changed had he done so...

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The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 34

The Sanguo Yanyi - Chapter 34:

Behind The Screen, Lady Cai Overhears A Secret;

Across The Tan Torrent, The Dilu Horse Carries Its Master.

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WARNING! THE POPCORN YOU ARE EATING HAS BEEN PISSED IN. FILM AT ELEVEN. :p

Just checking to make sure you're paying attention.

Okay, now that I got the joking around out of the way, it's time for the commentary for Chapter 34. Cao Cao's subdued the north, and now he sets his eyes towards the south, the lands below the Great River, where dwell Liu Biao and Sun Quan. And, did I mention, Liu Bei? Yes, indeed, Liu Bei fled a few chapters ago to Liu Biao during the debacle at Guan Du. Now Liu Bei and his underlings might possibly be the finest officers Liu Biao's got, excepting, of course, Wei Yan and Huang Zhong, who have yet to be introduced into the story.

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